my worst nightmare.

Gray and dark blue. The skies over the Pittsburg house were inky and overcast. It was dusk. I walked in through the front door. I was wearing a gray-blue dress. Family, friends, and former classmates were in the living room. Alex was there and the reason for why I was quite unaware. I was then informed that he and Alexandrea were in love and everybody was just 'so happy' for them. I was baffled; there was nothing I could say. Terri said that she hoped that Alexandrea would come back because she knew Alexandrea could "save Alex." From what he needed saving I did not know. The fact that I had been/still was in love with him didn’t matter to any of them. Not even to my own mother. It was like rubbing salt and pouring lemon juice over an open wound that had also recently been burned. I expressed my hurt and my anger and told everybody that this always happened; Alexandrea always took the ones I loved away from me and that I would always and forever be second best. But nobody would listen; I was “being irrational” they said. The support for the Alex/Alexandrea relationship was too much to handle. I ran out of the house bawling my eyes out in frustration and sadness.

It started to rain. As I was running around the front of my grandparents' house, it seemed as if time had slowed. My dress was softly fluttering around me in the wind from the storm. Suddenly I realized how dark it was and how frightened I was by the darkness. I decided to go back to my house and run upstairs to my parents' bedroom where I could go to bed crying. When I entered their room I heard something moving around on the far side of the room so I carefully and nervously turned on the bathroom light. I turned around to face the rest of the room and saw Joe Borrayo peeing on Starshine’s pillow and I was at a loss for words. I recalled that earlier Joe had said something about pulling pranks all day, so this had to be one of those "pranks". He had two friends there with him that I didn't recognize. I walked over to him as I explained why I was so upset and said that all I wanted to do was sleep, so I asked if he would please leave. I sat down at the foot of the bed when he handed me a cup of water and told me to drink it. I did. I told him that I desperately wanted to get away from there, away from the pain Alexandrea continued to cause me. He said that I could go back to his house for the night. I tried to get up from the bed to go with him, but I couldn't. I slowly started to realize he had drugged my drink and my only question was "Why?" The words of his response were foggy from the haze my drink had created, but he said something about carrying me and a photoshoot. I was glassy-eyed and almost unconscious when Melissa came into the room with a camera. I was bewildered, but I trusted Melissa and I trusted Joe so I didn’t ask any more questions. The darkness overwhelmed me.